| to those with seashell eyes and no doubt in the background |
[19 Oct 2008|02:54pm] |
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So long time no post. I almost miss high school and the feeling that livejournal was my life line. I love/ hate looking back at what was and what could have been. But to say that I am thrilled at the way things turned out would be an understatment. I have definitly become the type of person who can cowboy up and admit when i was/am wrong. I fucked up a lot. a lot. a lot. But it is important to not let your fuck ups define who you are and who you want to be. There is shit I am so ashamed of, I blush when I think about it but get over it. I live 15 hours away from my hometown and lightyears away from that person I was before. I miss people I know I can never connect with on that level again. If it ended badly just know I am lucky to even at one time have you in my life. If it just ended with no bad feelings....i know you will like me a whole lot more than before, because I am rad. peace.
p.s.- i cant wait to see snow for the first time in 2 years....see ya'll in december
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[18 Sep 2008|09:48am] |
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so i was feeling kinda crummy this morning...
i decided to check my livejournal bc i havn't in a long long while...
im really glad i did bc Casey Loring's entry about his girlfriend who watches anime and does
it with him makes me smile.
im glad u are getting laid AND get to watch your favorite tv shows with a girl Casey Loring!
i hope you have a great day!
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| scanning through livejournal past.... |
[06 Jun 2008|10:51am] |
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[Jul. 6th, 2005|09:54 am]
so yeah.
everyone... i have to admit i did it again. being the terrible person that i am...
i stole another one of barbra dillbeck's cheese sticks... the woman who can only eat yogert and cheese because she broke her mouth. aand the worst part is i didn't even enjoy the whole thing.
ha.
anyways. CLIT FEST WAS AMAZING. um... that is really all to say, i have already told everyone who cares and i doubt you guys would want to read a big long paragraph. people there weren't as friendly as i had hoped. there scene is totally different then around here... everyone whent to the show so sit in an alley and smoke pot and drink... i dunno the show were absolutly the best part though. sooo many bands i tell ya what. we were all a little dissappointedto hear that behind enemy lines and snother oppresive system had canceled... ya know, but what can ya do.
i bought some cds and shirts and stuff, that was fun.
and my parents have no idea.
then i have spent some wonderful time with jen emily and bethany.
yesterday was andrew's birthday. and for those of you who don't know, he was my ex-best guy friend. then he got drunk and knocked up a slut so things have changed. i did see him yesterday. and inbetween not talking to him and flipping him off,i was sad about loosing a friend and unfortunatly lost another friend to the retarded bucket of stupid named clayton degarmo.
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| 2007 survey |
[03 Jan 2008|04:39pm] |
What did you do in 2007 that you'd never done before?
-gone on the tower of terror at disney world
-moved out of the state
-lived by myself
-made good friends outside of high school
Did you keep your new year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
-i didnt really make resolutions but i plan on making some this year
What you visit?
-columbus ohio and flordia.
What would you like to have in 2008 that you lacked in 2007?
-more concentration on school
-more tolorence for assholes
What date(s) from 2007 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
-may 6th:last day at the apartment in saint joe
-july 5th:ariana was born
-december 15th:saw bethany for the first time in too long
What was your biggest achievement of the year?
- being an adult
-not doing drugs
-my grades
-deciding to go to law school
-over all becoming a better human being
What was your biggest failure?
-letting go of friends....but at least this time i know i am not at fault...for once
Did you suffer illness or injury?
-hmmm nope
What was the best thing you bought?
-i dont buy anything....i hate parting with money
Where did most of your money go?
-food and alcohol and gas
What did you get really, really, really excited about?
-ariana being born
-my apartment
-seeing/hearing bethany
-my parents buying me a laptop
-criminal justice 101
What song(s) will always remind you of 2007?
-the sweets by yeah yeah yeahs
-for reasons unknown-the killers
-fuck you softly-tenecious d
-alkaline trio
-dashboard by modest mouse
Compared to this time last year, are you:
ii. thinner or fatteer?
-thinner
iii. richer or poorer?
-richer but more responsibilities
What do you wish you'd done more of?
-swimming
-spending more time with beth
-family stuff
What do you wish you'd done less of?
-Procrastination
-worrying about people
Did you fall in love in 2007?
-Uh Huh
How many one-night stands?
-0
What was your favorite TV program?
-I love new york, sabrina the teenage witch, gilmore girls, and rock of love
Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
-cameron diaz
What was the best book you read?
-a million little pieces
What were your greatest musical discoveries?
-bob dylan...thank you krystn
-the who
What did you want and get?
-i need or want nothing....jst to see more friends and family
What was your favorite film of this year?
-JUNO!!!!
What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
-spent it with family and friends
What one thing would have made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
-uhhhhh everythings good
What kept you sane?
-smiles
-Jokes
-Friends
Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
-kirk acevedo from oz
Who did you miss?
family
bethany
tania
sasha
friends from muskegon in general
Who was the best new person you met?
-meghan and ariana
Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2007:
people are going to make fucking stupid decisions no matter how much you try to talk them out of shit.
let them go...they should know you care.
Quote a song lyric that sums up your year:
You came to me like a dream
The kind that always leaves
Just as the best part starts
It ends so abruptly
And leaves you stunned and naked
In your bedroom all alone
It's kinda funny how something so soothing
Gets interrupted by the ring of a telephone
And you broke me like the cigarette
That I busted on the day I quit
But now that i've been drinking
I'm out of smokes and I wish that I had it
Woke up to my daily headache
And the realization that you are gone
Oh my sweet darling happiness
You've been away from me all along
One thing that I've never said-
I'm truly happy in my heart and in my head
A lonely liver suspended in liquid
You came to me like a dream
The kind that always leaves,
Just as the best part starts
It ends so abruptly
And leaves you stunned and naked
In your bedroom all alone
It's kinda funny how something so soothing
Gets interrupted by the ring of a telephone
One thing that I've never said-
I'm truly happy in my heart and in my head
A lonely liver suspended in liquid
It's one thing that I never did was smile
Missing a case - lacking a lid
My heart bleeds for what you never did
You never did
For what you never did
Never did
For what you never did
Never did, never did, never did
You never did, you never did
It's one thing that I've never said-
I'm truly happy in my heart and in my head
A lonely liver suspended in liquid
It's one thing that I never did was smile
Missing a case - lacking a lid
My heart bled for what you never did until now
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[06 Dec 2007|02:05pm] |
cunt cunt cunt cunt cunt professor.
cunt!
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[11 Oct 2007|08:37pm] |
sippin on gin and juice,
laid back...
with my mind on my moeny and my money on my mind.
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[06 Sep 2007|12:35pm] |
with much luck like a duck....
here i come chicago.
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[24 Aug 2007|11:03pm] |
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mood |
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concerned |
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music |
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yeah yeah yeahs- mdern romance |
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its not a good situation,
but i think it is a good thing for you.
maybe you will learn something.
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[15 May 2007|11:03pm] |
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mood |
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contemplative |
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music |
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alkaline trio |
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i find myself referencing the events in my life per my livejournal entries. I used to write posts pretty much everyday, nothing too dramatic i dont think but at least keeping records of the people and things that my life revolved around. i stuck with the basics, krystn, jen, allen, josh and whoever left a stamp of significance in my world. Time has gone by and shit changes. Sometimes it feels as though old friends and I will forever be on the battlefield. I guess you could say I lost the war. No fight or dissagreement will matter to me enough to keep hurt feelings or hatred in me. I realized that i dont give a shit because people who truely care or want to be friends know me enough to know I too care for them and only want the best for them.
when you leave the place you call home for college or whatever life throws at you, it is easy to figure out that sometimes you are not going to be friends with everyone you used to be.
with a few people aside, i do enjoy most people's company. I spent some time with someone very special to me the other day. We hadn't seen eachother in months and everytime i see her i am reminded of why i always loved her. We could click, and pick right up again....well at least it seemed like that to me.
thats what i want. I want people who i dont see everyday because i live somewhere else but when i see them it instantly feels normal and as though i never left.
i hope we can be friends or real friends like before. everything that happened does not even matter anymore, so lets just say fuck it.
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| times they are a changin |
[07 May 2007|02:38pm] |
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mood |
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bored |
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music |
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the decemberists-we both go down together |
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in town....
and suddenly want to be out of it.
bored.bored.bored.boring muskegon
i moved to st. joe, and i missed muskegon, im moving to atlanta, and im going to miss st. joe...strange.
i never thought i wouldnt miss the comfort of muskegon....now i am just extremely uncomfortable in this foreign place.
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[22 Apr 2007|08:14pm] |
My life is so much more wonderful because of her.....<3
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[14 Feb 2007|09:29am] |
why oh why do i leave everything to the last minute?
class tonight class this afternoon and i still have to write an essay and do a few assignments....i suck
maybe i should get off the computer and do it eh?
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[22 Dec 2006|11:53pm] |
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music |
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robert stack's voice is music to my ears |
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you know why i love family video?
ill tell you why,
the only place in the world a girl can rent UNSOLVED MYSTERIES on dvd for a $1, and keep the 3 discs she got for 5 whole nights!
ahhh the simple pleasures of life.
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[19 Dec 2006|12:27pm] |
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i absolutely hate being sick....and what is worse is when i have to be at work and be sick.
remember when you were a kid and when it was cool being sick because that meant you didnt have to go to school? so you would just sleep and lay around the house, watching tv....ahh those were the days.
now, i woke up not being able to speak and feeling so achey i would prefer to die as opposed to taking a shower and trying to look presentable in order to go to work and be miserable sitting all day at this god damned desk...staring at this computer and wishing your body would just magically appear somewhere other than where you are now....preferably bed...ahh bed....some nightquil, 7up, and my bed...
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[13 Nov 2006|01:09pm] |
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music |
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cars on the street |
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mondays are my favorite...
i only have art class on mondays..
and i dont have to go to work.
sublime.
tonight i have to drive over and get my bike from my old apartment. i need 2 new tires before i can use it though.
thanksgiving weekend i will be in muskegon. this weekend i am going to the art museum in chicago which im looking foward to.
bought the final season of arrested development finally....the best comedy on network television having to go off the air because people didn't tune in...shame on you.
got to go to class right now, so good day.
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[07 Nov 2006|04:22pm] |
now everyone remember to get out there and vote today...
if you dont, well we might be stuck with the son of a millionaire who really had nothing better to do than to run for govenor and talk about gay marriage being wrong and how he is just an ignorant peice of shit who never had to work a day in his life...
just another republican asshole
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[05 Nov 2006|05:27pm] |
war on terrorism paper almost typed...
im so tired..
want to quit...
but i cant...
i want that republican asshole to read this and cry! cry i say!
no not really cry, but challenging me to a debate would be sufficient.....last week he called me a hippy....that was a lie...i dressed up as satan for halloween.....damn lies.
this last week was hell with school.....this week is going to be even worse.
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[03 Oct 2006|10:49am] |
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mood |
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eh, could go either way |
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music |
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only the sounds in my head |
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so i went to the farmer's market in downtown st. joe this saturday.
got some amazing apples, potatoes, tomatoes, squash, and some cabbage.
made out like a bandit only spent 10$.
made some cabbage rolls (pigs in a blanket) w/ boca ground fake meat and mashed tomatoes up for the sauce.
its was pretty amazing im not going to lie.
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[29 Sep 2006|08:56am] |
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mood |
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annoyed |
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music |
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modest mouse |
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livejournal livejournal.... wow its been awhile...but i do read you everyday, if that makes it any better.
school is good
work is good
shoes are good
actually i take that back...school isnt good. for one reason, fucking political science. just a whole bunch of bush-loving conservative assholes that think abortion is wrong, but going overseas and killing innocent people and taking over their country is PATRIOTIC.
....if being patriotic means riding into muslim countries with a cowboy from fucking conneticut (bush) and distroying innocent civilians lives....then fuck patriotism.
and i love how bush-loving conservatives get so confused when you tell them Iraq had nothing to do with 911...it was the taliban from afghanistan.
and ps im not saying abortion is right for everyone...im just sayingthat the government should have NO SAY in what we do with our bodies....and that republicans shouldnt bring christianity into government...there needs to be a COMPLETE seperation of church and state, in my opinion.
ahh...sorry, i could talk about this shit all day.
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